“VICE OR ADVICE?” THE ADVISED COLUMN

I don’t think highly of myself. I never have and I really think that that confuses people. I’ve been told that I’m mysterious and with every change it appears that I hide only to reemerge brand new.  It would seem as though that I live my life as if there was some truth to be revealed when in all actuality I just live. When my life calls for a transition I’m not concerned about involving anyone as I begin the lengthy and all consuming process of starting over. Instead I have learned to rely on God which typically means isolation.  Webster defines change as the following; To make different in some particular: Alter To make radically different: Transform To give a different position, course, or direction to To replace with another to make a shift from one to another - Switch To exchange for an equivalent sum of money To undergo a modification of To put fresh clothes or covering on The definitions were even broken down into transitive and intransitive verbs. So the word change is a multif

Webster defines the late bloomer as someone who becomes successful, attractive, etc. at a later time in life than other people.  Scientifically it’s defined as a child who goes through puberty later than their peers. It is also known as constitutional delayed puberty, and it’s the most common cause of late maturity.  So, why this topic?  A number of reasons but I guess the main one would be a question that I proposed about myself to myself.. (writers, am I right?)  Do late bloomers actually exist or are there just people who were born to be set apart and or different.. allowing them to break free from and surpass the matrix? Biologically, yes. I’m what would be constituted as a late bloomer because I promise you I didn’t get real boobs until I was 24 and then my body changed yet again at 28…introducing my child bearing hips.. Anywho, I’m the second oldest of my moms 4 children and somehow everyone always assumes that my younger siblings are older than me. So, in that aspect yes.  Psych

There was a time when I couldn’t be trusted with disappointment. There was a time when I couldn’t see past my pain. Anger fueled my spirit allowing me to mismanage it all. It stole from me, took everything from me.. The most important thing being time.. How many times will I look back? How many times can I replay the same situation in my head when I know that the choices that I make affect too many people?! Can you hold me down without holding me back? Can you really and truly hold me down without holding me back? Hold me but please don’t hold me down only to suffocate me! Please?! Unanswered prayers, pain and heartbreak have led too many people down traumatic paths because they keep looking back to dwell in their own turmoil. Everyday they are choosing to be bound by their own “demons” continuously allowing their unhealed pain to invite darkness into their life prone heavy hearts. No more pain escape attempts No more pain escape attempts No more pain escape attempts So, how will we st

Back in 2016, I conducted research by asking my co-workers, friends and family what they thought a relationship was. To my surprise most people were stumped by the question and legitimately could not answer with a response that made sense for themselves. Perplexed, I asked more questions and when they still weren't sure they began to get defensive. For those that could articulate their answers - their rebuttals were typical as they solely defined a relationship as a union between two people who love each other.  Neither underwhelmed or overwhelmed I began to dig deeper. How could we spend most of our lives in relationships and not be able to define them? Yes, you read the title correctly. This excerpt is about dating however I feel like its pressing to properly discuss what a union is before we delve into what the chronological differences are and the direct impact that they may have on our lives.  Webster defines a relationship as; the state of being related or interrelated, the r

I open my phone to everyone looking the same!!! BBLs are more popular than the 90s boob job without any indication of slowing down. They even have BBL clothing brands.. All body types are being created on the surgery table and not in the gym!  Help!!!  Everyone is dancing and creating aesthetic homes and content. There is no more privacy because the more that you reveal, the more subscribers and followers you’ll attain. So, the goal is to acquire more things and make them look as perfect as possible. Homes are looking better than the popular furniture showrooms..   Ahhhhhh!!!  The goal might not have been self idolatry however social media has morphed this world into an ongoing segment of influencing, coaching and self proclaimed professionals for every avenue of life!!!!! Most people DON’T put their phones down long enough to enjoy life and now that AI is becoming more and more prevalent they won’t have to!!! AI will just do it for them.  Technology is evil and the lasting effects of

Okay hear me out, I'm flat out exhausted. I mean the kind of exhausted that'll have you bringing your paper bag filled with groceries into your room with everything still skillfully packed in it... Uhm yeah, as I type this - I am scrummaging through said bag as I see fit diligently looking for another ginger beer because I need it.  I digress... This is the type of exhaustion that will honestly have you so annoyed because EVEN IF you wanted to do something, you'd probably end up crying before you actually moved a muscle. Whenever I would hear about people going to the hospital for exhaustion I always scoffed because I thought that it was just dramatic PR stunts until it happened to me. Once I was so run down and bone-weary from minimal sleep and constant errands throughout the day that I ended up throwing up in the bushes by the end of the night.  I was mortified however it was definitely a lesson for me to really start paying attention to my body so that I can properly car